The Catfish Tackle Co.catalogue no. 9 · fall edition

personal advertisement page 1 · reply to box 9

Hello, I am a multimillionaire.

Genuine cat. Recent photo. Absolutely not a fish. Lives on a yacht somewhere off Solana and is very interested in you, specifically.

order no. / contract $CATFISH
soon
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line in the water. contract goes here the minute he wakes up.

A smug cream tabby cat wearing a teal fish costume hood, looking at the camera like he owns a yacht
fig. 1 · photo taken yesterday. also in 2009.
As seen in Your DMs Your Other DMs Lake Monthly Gift Card Quarterly The Spam Folder

item no. 402 · the main attraction

Reel in a date

Cast the line and pull up a fresh dating profile. Every profile is a different man. Every photo is the same cat.

  1. Cast to reel in a profile.
  2. Swipe left if you have eyes.
  3. Match if you would like to hear about his bank.
red flags spotted 0000
profiles reeled
0
matches
0
left swipes
0

inspector status: hopeful

The pond is quiet.

Somebody rich is out there. Cast the line.

fall tackle for the modern admirer

The Catalogue

All items ship from international waters. Prices are listed in feelings.

A chipped teal fishing lure carved like the cat's head in a fish hood, hanging from a line with a hook below

no. 101

The Lure

Hand painted wooden cat head on a sharp hook. Smug expression sold separately, already installed. Fish have no idea. Neither did you.

free with first message

no. 102

The Yacht Photo

Taken in front of a stranger's yacht at a public marina. Frames the cat from the costume up. Works in every city.

$4.99

no. 103

Webcam, Broken

Permanently out of order since 2011. He will fix it right after you send the fee.

out of stock forever

no. 104

The Inheritance

Several million in gold, currently stuck at customs. Requires one small fee. Then a second small fee. Then the customs officer needs a gift card.

fee: small

no. 105

Gift Cards, Assorted

His love language. Scratch the back, read him the code, receive three heart replies.

any amount

no. 106

Second Account

For when you block the first one. Same cat, new name, recovered from the same yacht.

comes free

What the fish are saying

"He said he was a cat. He was a cat. He was also somehow a fish. I gave him my worm."

Gary, carp, 4 lbs

"Swiped left. He sent a request from his other account in four seconds."

Linda, trout, lake behind the gas station

"I asked for a video call and he sent the same photo again, but closer."

Bernard, pike, retired

clip and keep

Order form

Four steps. No webcam required.

  1. 1
    Get a Solana wallet. Phantom or Solflare, phone or browser.
  2. 2
    Add some SOL. Buy it in the wallet or send it from an exchange.
  3. 3
    Open the coin on pump.fun. Use the button below or paste the contract from the coupon up top.
  4. 4
    Swap SOL for $CATFISH. Allow 6 to 8 seconds for delivery.
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